Subjective reality and being your best self
There were only a few things that really belonged to me
Who I am, who I was, and who I want to be.
–Kids and Heroes by The Bouncing Souls
Subjective reality is an interesting concept. It’s the idea that the reality we experience is a reflection of our inner beliefs. This is the complete opposite of the way most people view the world. They view the world as something that has defined laws and we must conform to those rules. This is what is called an “objective reality”. It makes sense right? There are things that we can’t change - touch a stove and get burned for example. Much of the world around us is very objective and what we don’t learn first hand we are taught by others. We accept what the world gives us and learn to live around it.
However, not all of life is objective. The person you are, the qualities you espouse, what you make of yourself - all these things are components of a subjective reality. You can will yourself to change. The phrase “fake it until you make it” can be used but it’s not quite all inclusive of this powerful concept. If you truly believe something then you will subconsciously start to manifest that and in turn the rest of the so called “objective” world will reflect it back to you. Ever notice how it is the most confident guys who seem to do the best in dating? It’s not because they are using some secret trick… they just fully expect that they will have success because in their minds, “why wouldn’t they?” They are creating a subjective reality and the world is reflecting back that which they already know to be true.
So how do you start using this subject reality idea to be your best self? Well first and foremost you have to be congruent with what you want. Your idea of what you want to become has to be something you really really want. Not just a, “well maybe I could be” or a “I think I might kinda want this….” Your image of your best self have to be something that you know deep inside is your essential character and deeply important to you. With that congruent idea of what you want to be you can start consciously thinking about it while you perform tasks and deal with people. Ask yourself, “how would the ideal me handle this?” At first it can feel weird to be thinking through all your actions, but in time it becomes second nature and you begin to manifest your own subjective reality. You have your concept of who you want to be and by force of will you make it happen.
When you are congruent and manifesting your desires in your own actions, the rest of the world will start to reflect your own beliefs about your self back to you. When you perform the actions of a confident person people will treat you as such. It’s a cycle and by working hard at starting it, the world will reinforce it and it will be true in both subjective and objective reality.
It’s a continuous process and I’m always thinking about how I can move towards my ideal self. I take a bit of time to myself and think what qualities I’m manifesting right now. What do I want to keep? What do I want to remove? What would I like to add? For instance I want to be a person who is a person of action rather than one who is just all talk. I focus on that and work towards that goal in the choices I make, in time this will become more and more a part of me. It’s a weird feeling to have the power to change yourself and while it can be hard at the start (we all slip up from time to time) it gets to be a great feeling. When you start naturally behaving like your best self it’s very rewarding.
Tags: best self, change, Lifestyle, subjective reality
